God knows, even if I don't!

Greetings to all :)

I believe the last blog I've posted basically was an update on my life at the moment. I shared some of the goals that I wanted to accomplish during this year and how I was doing, as far as making them come into fruition. Here is a wee update on them . . .

1. As far as reading different books within the Bible, I really haven't been reading as much as I should tbh. Every once in awhile I'll have the desire to read or do a Bible plan, but most of the time I honestly don't. No I'm not necessarily proud of that at all because as a Christian I should aim to draw nearer to Him and a huge part of becoming Christ-like is by reading His word. It's just that honestly I'm not much of a reader, well at least anymore. There are many books that I have that I truly wanted to read at one point, but just never got around to doing so. I get that the Bible is the most important book to read & don't get me wrong bc I do enjoy reading the Word of God, it's just that I simply just struggle with staying rooted in it.

2. As far as building credit goes, I believe that I'm doing awesome with that. Because I still stay with my mom, there's not much that I have to pay for within this season, minus my cell phone. I do contribute towards other bills, groceries, gas & things as such but the main bill I'm responsible for and that's in my name is the phone. I've definitely been staying on top of paying my bill on time & even though I know that building credit is deeper than that, this is a start! I do look forward to coming across other means of building my credit within the near future.

3. Becoming healthier is actually up and down for me lolol. It's like one week I desire to lose my stomach and then the next week I'm like "soooo, about this whopper!" haha but seriously. Doing the Daniel's Fast definitely allowed me to see that it is possible for me to eat healthy because I did it for 3 weeks straight. So I do know that I can do it, it's just up to me to gain that discipline and focus again. As far as working out goes, I honestly go to the gym when I have a ride to go. Y'all know that I don't have a car, so whenever my cousin goes, I basically exercise with her. I do know that working out does not have to be in the gym, but tbh the gym motivates me way more than working out at home.

4. Finding a better job has been a bust lol. It seems as if jobs are hypocritical, if we are being honest. They will say that they want someone who has this type of degree but when you have one, you're simply "over-qualified" for the position. This is something that I don't understand but it's possible God doesn't want me to. I know that the position He has for me will simply be fit for me and no human will be able to stop me from attaining it!!

5. Getting into medical school is still a work in progress, you guys. Long story short, I didn't perform well AGAIN on the exam and I couldn't believe it. I actually spent time studying this time and ironically, my score went down compared to the first attempt. I think the hardest part about this whole process is the fact that I always think about the things I've achieved prior to this moment. I was my high school's class salutatorian, was named the first senior scholar from my high school, did dual enrollment in high school allowing me to graduate with two certificates before my diploma, went to college on a full academic scholarship & graduated from college with honors. If anything, this process has humbled me because though I never boasted about my achievements, sometimes it's so easy to take the focus off of God and to put it on yourself. At one point I began to view myself as "dumb" and even questioned my knowledge, but I know that was condemnation sent from satan himself.

Lord knows that this test isn't cheap ($315.00 to be exact) and I honestly hate the fact that I have to keep retaking it. But I know that we sometimes have to make sacrifices for what we want in life and this same $315 that I keep spending to take the test, I will be bringing in way more as a pediatrician. I will say that I wasn't as disappointed as I was when I took it during the first time because I tried to mask how I felt originally. I didn't allow my feelings to truly set in, especially those that I had towards God. But this time, I immediately poured out my emotions to God and shared my frustrations with Him, thus allowing me to come to terms with them and actually move forward. I am happy to announce that the marathon will continue and I'm going to give it another shot in a few months. A sweet young woman shared a few pointers with me as far as how to perform better this time, so I plan to utilize her study method. I ask that you keep me in prayer, especially for me to keep going in spite of how things may seem right now.

But aside from all of that, my life is absolutely awesome! No, things aren't perfect and there is a lot that I don't understand, but I can't fix my mouth to complain about anything either. In spite of how things may seem right now, I know that God will open up the windows of Heaven and pour out blessings really soon -- not only for me, but for the person reading this!

OH! Many of you know that I have an inspirational account on Instagram (@frompiecestoamasterpiece) that is centered around my blogs and simply just posts about inspiration lol. We've recently celebrated our 1 year anniversary or maybe birthday, I'm still trying to figure out which one would be best fitting for that lol. Even still, I'm just grateful for the support, encouragement and love, you guys. None of this would be possible without my support system and I pray that you all continue to stay with me on this journey. Love you all and thanks again for rocking with me! Until next time <3